The "Granny Awards" Mystery

Incident Report
The date: January 27, 2004 ~ 6:15 p.m. ~ A school in Lansing, Ks

The Incident: It was the setting of the annual "Granny Awards" where 3rd and 4th graders flocked in their Gap Kids designer outfits to sit and be entertained by live music and dance performances while awaiting disclosure of awards for "Best Musical Giant" and the like.

All was going according to plan until the Fairy-Godmother screamed. Cinderella's slipper had gone missing and Prince Charming had no shoe with which he could find his bride. It was a case of whodunit. Enter the suspects:

The Suspects
Suspect #1:



Name: Elizabeth ~ Age: 10 ~ Performer at the "Granny Awards"

Bio: The singing starlett herself playing an evil step-sister and whose audience-moving solo can be viewed in part here.

Motive: Noted for her sometimes uncontrolled temper, was seen hours before the performance holding the shoe in question in a threatening manner to Jack, the latter cowering behind his beanstock. Apparently, he had made an unflattering remark about the starlett's height, that she would be difficult to see in the balcony without first standing on a box and thus would never make it in show-business. It's suspected that the Elizabeth may have thrown the shoe at Jack in a rage and lost it down Alice's rabbit hole, where it would be completely unrecoverable.

Suspect #2:



Name: Gabriela ~ Age: 2 ~ Attendee

Bio: Quick-witted sister to the Starlett above and attends each performance.

Motive: Recently rejected for the role of Cinderella due to stage age-minimum requirements, this youth may be jealous of the time each of the performers are able to spend with her older sister and thus be sabotaging Elizabeth's career. Mysteriously, this toddler went missing with her diaper bag in tow backstage before the performance.

Suspect #3:



Name: Josh ~ Age: 22 ~ Attendee

Bio: This journalist for the University Daily Kansan was seen peeling out of the Lansing School parking lot at 5:15 p.m.

Motive: Esteemed writer for the Kansan whose article made the cover last week has since come under fire due to an anonymously released photograph of the journalist holding a cup of questionable contents at a party. It may be possible that this upcoming-talent reporter is attempting to divert public attention from this scandal by "creating" news...

The Show Must Go On




Fortunately, minutes before the performance, the drama instructor donated one of her own shoes for the sake of the awards and was forced to hop between sets backstage. The above picture was taken after the show.

The awards proved a huge success. Elizabeth was viewed by all and earned herself a standing ovation by even those in the balcony, Gabriela spent quality time in Elizabeth's arms after the show and played dress up in the latter's costume at home, and Josh wrote an exciting expose on theft at KU in Thursday's edition of the Kansan.

Not so fortunate for the residents in Kansas, a criminal is still on the streets in your midst as this mystery remains yet unsolved...

-T.